Jumping to meet other people’s needs and requests can be a good thing WHEN balanced with my schedule and obligations. Unfortunately, my difficulty with saying no usually means that I say YES ALOT.
My mother tells me that I am Miss Nice Girl. I don’t know about all of that, but I know that I don’t like to disappoint people. Yes, as I have admitted before, I am a people pleaser–on the road to recovery.
During a leadership training at work last week, the speaker talked about how to say NO without actually saying “NO”. As I sat there so tired and fidgety from how crazy my schedule has been recently, I was immediately intrigued.
I get asked to host Zumbathons® for various organizations quite often. A Zumbathon® is a fund raising event where several instructors come together and teach a 2 hour class/event and the proceeds are donated to a charity.
Now of course Zumbathons® are wonderful things and I LOVE to help the community. I am humbled to be asked to participate in events by all of the great organizations out there with great causes. However, Zumbathons® are usually in addition to regular class times and they require quite a bit of orchestrating and advertising.
This weekend, I will be hosting one of the six Zumbathons® that I have on my schedule before mid May and the requests just keep coming. I have to BALANCE!
Balance means that sometimes I am going to have to deny a request.
When the speaker said she had a way to say NO with out saying the word, I blurted out: “Please tell me how to say the one word I NEED to say more but just don’t quite seeem to say as often as I should”.
The speaker said that instead of saying no and OVER-explaining why we cannot do something, we should use the USA method of denying a request:
U-Understand the Statement
So how does this look in action? Glad you asked!
Question: Would you host an event for our group?
U-I understand that your organization has great need and having a dance fitness type of event would be a fun and effective way to raise funds.
S-Unfortunately, my schedule is already booked for this fundraising season.
A-Perhaps we can speak in the Fall of this year when I begin to plan my Winter-Spring calendar for next year?
Want another one?
Question: Would you serve on the PTA executive board?
U-Wow, thanks for thinking of me! The PTA provides a lot of support for the students and staff.
S-Unfortunately, I am already committed to several other community and church events.
A-Although I am unable to serve in the executive board role, I may be able to help with the Spring Fling Event.
Divas, I am on a roll now! Move ova Miley Cyrus…. I’m having a party in the USA!
“But don’t begin until you count the cost. For who would begin construction of a building without first calculating the cost to see if there is enough money to finish it?
Do you have a hard time saying no?
This post is part of a weekly meme hosted by Shell at Things I can’t say!